Monday, May 14, 2012

Chewed Alive!

I went for a walk today and all was warm, sunny, and breezy.  It was very nice.  The dog loved it because her most favourite thing in the world to do is get wet, which she did a LOT of.  I don't believe that she missed a stream, puddle, swamp, river, or lake on our walk.  She splished, splashed, and splooshed.  She even helped me while I was watering my newly planted rhododendron, so I hosed her down, and then I hosed her down, and then I hosed her down.  Rinse, lather, repeat.  To say she loved it is the understatement of the century.  I should have called her Flipper. 

I was puttering around after my walk, digging the grass up and away from a couple of fruit trees, replanting some flowers which will be in the way when we upgrade the electrical coming into the house. Well "we" actually won't be doing the electrical, more like the electrician will be doing the actual work, thank the FSM.  Anyway these plants are in the way so they probably won't make it once the work commences so I'm starting to move them.  I would have moved all of them this evening except that suddenly the wind died down and I was practically carried off by the minions of Satan disguised as flies that are black.  The worst part is that the bastards want to drive you insane before gorging on your flesh.  They buzz around you head bouncing off your face, crawling up your nose, in your eyes, in your ears, and through your hair.  Then when they do land and manage to chomp a chunk of meat from your quivering flesh, they spit into the hole which causes you to grow enormous welts and itch like crazy. 

There are no words to describe exactly how much I hate them.  Most especially because now that it is warm enough to actually wear shorts and a tee outside I can't.  Well I could if I didn't mind looking like something that escaped from Zombieville. 


  1. Zilla's Other HalfMay 15, 2012 at 11:09 AM

    You and your brother are welcome to them. I have enough problems with skitters and other bitey insect-like deamons. You two are more than welcome to keep the black ones!

  2. Insects, the Yang with my Ying. The bad with the good. The bastards!

  3. We're putting off the "opening"in part due to exhustion and since we are exhausted, the friggen black flies. Here's hoping the little friggen buggers are done and gone ten days from now.

    1. What is the "opening"? Are you in the greenhouse business? Ten days for black flies...are you sure? Oh sweet mother of all that is none itchy I hope that is a true amount of time.